So your boyfriend has just told you it’s over and all you want to do is curl up in a ball and cry. Girl, don’t do that! You might have been having a great time with him, and you might even have thought that he was The One, but he isn’t the only one! With time and effort you will be able to move on.
There’s nothing wrong with grieving for a little while, but if you let it go on for too long or you let it take over your life, you’re gonna have a really tough time surviving this breakup and coming through the other side.
We’re not gonna lie – surviving a breakup and getting to a place where you can think about moving on won’t be easy, but it is possible, and millions of people do it every day. So, here are some tips to help you survive your latest break up and move on back to your fabulous, Divalicious self!
Allow Yourself to Feel Sad. You’ve just gone through a breakup, and you’ve lost someone who was important in your life, so it really is okay to grieve for what you’ve lost. Scream, cry, punch your pillow in anger and get all those feelings out there. You’ll soon start to feel a whole lot better than you would if you kept those feelings deep inside where they’d fester.
Try Meditation. You might think that only hippies and eastern monks meditate, but that simply isn’t true, at least not anymore. More Westerners than ever before are using meditation to clear their heads, relax and put a more positive spin on their lives, and if you want to deal with this breakup in the healthiest way possible, perhaps you should give it a try too. If you feel the urge to drink, eat a whole carton of ice cream or cry uncontrollably, sit down, close your eyes and concentrate on your breath instead. After just a few short minutes, you’ll feel a whole lot calmer and less likely to ‘medicate’ your post-breakup depression in an unhealthy way.
Maintain a Healthy Diet. When you’re sad, stressed out and trying to hold yourself together, what your body really needs is good food served up on a regular basis. Don’t be tempted to skip meals, and stay away from the junk as much as possible (ok, a little chocolate or ice cream when you’re really struggling is fine!). You might even want to take this opportunity to add more healthy foods like fruits, vegetables, whole grains and Detox Tea into your diet. Let’s face it when you feel good, and you look great, getting over a breakup is a lot easier!
Get Lots of Sleep. Sleep is restorative. No matter how bad you feel, things will always seem better after you’ve had a full eight hours in bed. If you’re struggling to get to sleep because you keep thinking about him and it hurts your heart, try writing down all of your worries, call a friend for a quick chat before bedtime or seek some professional advice in one of the handy books we’ve listed below. Once your issues are out in the open, they may not trouble you quite so much when you’re lying in bed at night.
Exercise. When you’ve just been dumped, all you want to do is lie in bed eating ice cream and watching Gilmore Girls or Empire again, we get it. But, you see, that isn’t what’s going to help you survive this breakup and come out the other side. Sure, there’s no harm in a little bit of wallowing, but you’ll find that you feel much better much more quickly if you get up, do some light exercise and get those good mood boosting endorphins pumping through your body
Have Some Fun. Fun times might have centered around your boo in the past, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t still have fun without him or her, and doing so will help you survive this breakup better than wallowing at home. So, call up your girlfriends and hit the local bars, plan a trip to your favorite art gallery or book yourself into a spa. Your mood will be uplifted, and you’ll forget about your split, at least for a little while.
Leave Obsessive Thoughts Behind. One of the worst things you can do when you’ve just broken up with someone is to obsess over every little detail of your relationship, wondering what you could have done differently. It’s over, and that isn’t going to change, all you’ll do is make yourself feel worse if you go over your relationship with a fine-tooth comb. So, whenever you start thinking those obsessive thoughts, tell yourself to stop, take a few deep breaths, and if you’re able to, perhaps meditate for a little while.
Delete Him from Facebook (and the rest of your life). If you’re going to be tempted to check out what your ex is doing on Facebook every five minutes, you should perhaps consider deleting him from your friend’s list too. Facebook can turn the coolest calmest girl into an obsessive crazy person following a breakup, and that’s definitely something you’ll want to avoid. You should also avoid checking his Instagram, Snapchat, YouTube Channel, etc. Finding out what’s happening in his life now that he’s without you will only drive you insane.
Take a Vacation. If you’re able to take some time off work, it might be worth doing so and using that time to take a relaxing solo vacation, where you can spend all day on the beach or go off exploring foreign climes – whatever appeals to you. You’ll be so busy soaking up the atmosphere that you’ll have little time to think about your failed relationship and plenty of time to heal your heart and soul.
Do Something Nice for Others. If you’re really struggling to stop thinking about your breakup, something that could really help you is by volunteering, committing random acts of kindness or doing something nice for friends, family or co-workers. By putting the focus on other people and how you could be of service to them, you’ll be able to shift your thinking to more positive things, and you’ll start to realize that your breakup really isn’t the end of the world.
What do you do to help yourself when you’re struggling to survive a tough breakup? Let the DivaGals know below!
photo credit: VH1