HOW-TO Create A Cleaning Partnership With Your Guy


Mike Eaton, CEO and founder of Hero Clean, gives the DivaGals some tips on getting our man to do the cleaning!

We want to get one thing straight: Guys clean. They are OCD cleaners of things about which they care. Have you ever seen a dirty Harley? Didn’t think so. The key is getting him to care – which makes this whole exercise a psychological project.

Before you venture down this path, I suggest you do a little research and reflection on why he may not be helping as much as you might like. Did his Mom clean up after him his whole life? Has cleaning become a VERY negative topic – to be avoided at all costs? Do your definitions of clean differ? Do you just go ahead and do it because it’s not worth trying to get him to help? This could go on and on, but you need to understand the why before you start creating your how plan … and make sure this starts as a drip process, not a fire hose. Ease into it – and I think you will find a much more willing partner in the process.

Here are some suggestions:

Explain to him why you like a clean house/clothes, etc. Put it in his terms. Perhaps suggest that he cleans and polishes his bike and car not because he thinks a sanitary mode of transportation is good for his health. It’s a reflection of him to the world. He may understand if you suggest that the house is that same reflection – but on you … or rather the both of you.

Give him a problem to solve – perhaps a cleaning problem. Maybe you don’t 100 percent know how to get the nasty smell out of the moisture wicking garments – let him research, teach you and solve the problem. It will give him ownership of the information and process, and all of the sudden, you will have a new laundry boy. Encourage him to continue to become that expert that you aren’t (even though you may be). Everyone likes feeling like they are adding value, so if you are the expert on everything and he feels like nothing but labor, his motivation will be much less.

Make it “WE”. Everything should be “we” or “us,” nothing me and you. You need this to be a team activity – and schedule it, so everyone can plan around it. Have kids like New Mom? If you can get the kids involved, even better. Dad and his son or daughter cleaning together? Not a bad thing.

Don’t judge and don’t be a control freak. If you are constantly looking over his shoulder disapprovingly, you will get nowhere. Let him make mistakes and nudge him on ways to more effectively or efficiently complete the process. Just remember how you would feel if he was constantly rolling his eyes while you were helping with a chore that used to be handled by him; mowing the lawn, painting the house, whatever. He will do things differently – let him. Let him own the process, be it good or bad. Getting him to do something “better” is going to be a lot easier than trying to force him to do it your way.

See what he gravitates towards and push him in that direction. It’s no different than recognizing what activities your children like and pushing them that direction. If he tends to sneak a load of his laundry in by himself, if you see him dusting his desk or the TV, then maybe that’s his thing. Observe, and pounce.

As with everything, you knew this was going to end up with Sex. Recently, there was a Levi’s ad on TV in the UK – and it simply showed a guy doing his laundry. It took the country by storm as Female Porn. Well, make him feel like seeing him clean is porn to you. I’ll leave it to you to figure out how that manifests itself, but it’s no different than that feeling you get when he says you look great in a new outfit, hair style, etc. Pour it on thick – I promise you it will work.

Don’t make him use YOUR cleaning products. To whatever he gravitates, let him shop for the products to use (or go with him to make sure he doesn’t come home with industrial cleaning products). I promise you guys don’t like cleaning clothes, countertops, etc. with products that smell like flowers or bubblegum – or have pink, baby blue, etc. packages with cute little puppies or stuffed animals on the label. Do him a solid and get him some guys cleaning products – I have some good ones to recommend.

….and finally, if none of this works, and he just sits around and does nothing, well, then perhaps he’s just as ass. But that’s a subject for another article.

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