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I Gave Up My Apartment For You: (A HOW-TO On Couple’s Reno)

By   |   September 29, 2016   |   Food Fashion Style

Image Gal Samantha von Sperling found love on JFiix.com. Now she’s renovating a space with her new man!

Our personal lair gives us sanctuary, even Batman has his cave. Living alone in Gotham is tough; living with somebody else is even tougher. For most of us the price of living in Manhattan, aside exorbitant rent, is being willing to live in a teeny tiny shoebox apartment. You finally have your shoebox the way you want it and then you fall in love… so you give up your shoebox to move into theirs. This is when problems can start.

Your personal space is your piece of the rock. Its where you get to be you without filter or apologies. Over 50 percent of marriages fail. I wonder if that percentage is higher in urban areas where people live in close quarters.

It’s best to love somebody an awful lot if your going to share an apartment with them. There’s no place to run and nowhere to escape when you have a fight. You can’t slam the door and march into the other room (especially for those who share a studio). Some people can’t even choose to sleep on the sofa because the the sofa is the pullout where you sleep already!

You loved your bachelor/bachelorette pad and making the adjustments to cohabitation is difficult. We live in a city where something that was once a walk in closet now gets sold to us as bedroom! Certainly keeping some mystique in close quarters can be next to impossible. Breath deep.

How to make it all work?

Respected architect Jeffrey Drucker told me that when he was in school he had an assignment to design a home which would induce a couple to argue. Not enough closet space, cabinets that are too high, no room for people’s things etc. If in theory, bad design can test a relationship to its limits, then surely the opposite could also be true; co-habitational bliss through intelligent design.

Rule No. 1 Eliminate stuff as much as possible. This does not mean throw out all his stuff, (even if you want to), but rather that you each edit your own belongings to the best of your abilities and help each other with man power, suggestions and moral support. One of the hardest, but best things I ever did was get rid of all of my stuff. So difficult that I now get a little hesitant about acquiring new stuff sometimes. But the blending of more than one person in an apartment requires editing all persons belongings and acquiring some new things for the greater good of those dwelling there.

Rule No. 2 Edit, rearrange & organize. Organization is key. You need to meld your styles and that’s through these three actions. Once done,┬áorganize some more.┬áAnd when you think you’ve maximized your use of space, chances are you you can do better.┬áRespect things that are dear to each other-eg. Your shoe collection, his baseball cards, Xbox and other gadgets.

Rule No. 3 Solve Problems.┬áYou’re a neat freak and he leaves his socks all over the floor – Get maid service.┬áHe squeezes the toothpaste from the middle you squeeze it from the end – Try an automatic toothpaste squeezer.┬áYou rise at dawn for your 3-mile run. He works the night shift – think of additional places to take your cat naps. The key is pick and chose battles and keep you eye on the prize

Rule No. 4 Your tastes WILL be┬ádifferent. (You might be thinking, “What taste? They don’t have any!”) Remain calm and try to remember why you fell in love in the first place. Hire a professional to help you blend your aesthetics and minimize quarreling.

Your home is important, it’s your oasis in this asphalt jungle, a refuge from the rush.┬áHome can be and should be delicious. Even if your matchbox resembles a cave, it can still be lovely.

In the city where we live to work rather than work to live it’s important that you make “live” as blissful as possible.┬á

Your domestic life when you are home can be fabulous. If you’re willing to take the time to move the furniture to paint and plaster and consider your lifestyles you might have a chance and happy cohabitation in Gotham.

Filed Under: Food Fashion Style
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